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October 06, 2008

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nobody ever eat fifty eggs

but paul newman did

While I will remember Paul Newman fondly in his role as the protagonist in Cool Hand Luke, I doubt nobody will ever remember him for the sexually suggestive legends on the back of his salad dressing bottles. Here is an excerpt from Newman's Own Light Balsamic Vinaigrette dressing bottle,

"medium light Italian Starlet, daughter of Butch Cassidini, named Bitch Cassidini, leaps into the balloon basket, kisses Piloto, her lips smeared with Newman's Own Light Balsamic Vinaigrette, she murmurs "You taste of Sicily...of Naples baby," and patting his fanny she whispers, "and no fat!""

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